Marcia Marcia Marcia!

In a half-@rsed attempt at intellectual self-improvement and as a break from the mind-clearing, sweat-inducing hot-boddery of indoor rock-climbing, I occasionally like to get along to a public event at the State Library's Wheeler Centre, usually dragging Muddy along with me for company. Which is why we (and young Red) found ourselves at an IQ2 debate at the Melbourne Town Hall last Tuesday. This series of Oxford University - style debates has covered some interesting topics in the past, and this one - "Freedom of Speech is Over-Rated" - promised to be very interesting. Neither Muddy nor I hold firm views on the topic - we believe strongly in the principles of freedom of expression yet also wonder if freedom of speech is just a cover for bad manners - something obnoxious pricks trot out when they are challenged for their stupidity or offensiveness.

The crowd consisted of the usual mix of the young, the old, dags, grey cardies, retired public servants, booksellers, asymmetrical haircuts, bike helmets, beards and woolly vests, along with members of the aspiring literati, cl!terati, twitterati and blogerati - you know, Radio National listeners.

But I won't dwell on the crowd - what I am here to dwell on is how stultifyingly awful and chronically disappointing the first speaker for the affirmative, Professor Marcia Langton was. Oh. My. God. How could a normally articulate and otherwise charismatic speaker have come across so ill-prepared, so incoherent and rambling, so full of stillborn pauses and sentences that went deep south of nowhere. It was excruciating. It was embarrassing. Paper-shuffling? Running over time without getting a proper conclusion in? I expect better from a senior academic from such an august institution as the University of Melbourne.

Quick tip, Marcia: I don't think you need to be a brainiac constitutional lawyer to understand that the purpose of our constitution is not to enshrine individual rights - and consulting one might have helped you craft a better argument. Price of a coffee ($3.50 for a barista/barrister) would have saved you nine minutes of embarrassment. Not to mention podcast posterity...

I for one was grateful for the presence of uniformed students in too-short kilts - girls, pay attention to the three key lessons of public  speaking :

Prepare. Prepare. Prepare.