We've all been asked stupid questions in job interviews, but
one I heard recently via a friend was: “Where do you see yourself in five
years?”. To which my friend cheekily replied, “Retired”, so they countered with
“No, really?” and to which he could only reply once more, “Retired”.
Needless to say the interview went downhill from there.
What a dumb, dumb question. Who knows where anyone of us will be in five days, let alone five years? So if you ever get asked that question, here are some ready responses:
- Running a cat-walking business to tap into the growing older single-lady demographic.
- Directing Spanish Civil War re-enactments for elderly English tourists on Ibiza.
- Heading a research space station on Alpha Centauri.
- Competing for the grand prize ($200K and the chance to stalk, shoot and eat my rivals) on ‘The Biggest Loser’.
- Married to Kim Kardashian.
- Married to Michelle Bridges.
- Spearheading a new lifestyle movement a la ‘Tiny House’ – I’m thinking ‘The Tiny Skyscraper’, ‘The Tiny A380’ or ‘The Tiny Drawbridge’.
- President of a newly-created nation in Africa, the Pacific, or a former Soviet republic somewhere in Central Asia.
- Hosting my own dating show on primetime television.
- House-sitting for the Danish royal family.
Feel free to add any more to the list. To be forewarned is
to be forearmed in job interviews.
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