In New York City, the Word on the Streets is “Asshole”

Actually, make that “f***ing asshole”.  One night when Dusty and I were walking along Eighth Avenue in West Village last week, when we heard the screech of tyres, a sickening thud and…well, Dusty was ready to speed dial 911 on her (US) mobile, thinking an ambulance would be required. A Yellow Cab had struck a young woman at a pedestrian crossing, but her injuries were far from fatal, as the following verbatim account will demonstrate:

‘You hurt my arm! What the f**k you mean “you’re sorry?” You hurt my f***ing arm, you asshole! F**k you!”

It seems this near-fatal collision clearly hadn’t impaired the young woman’s vocal chords, nor did it affect her command of colourful invective. The Yellow Cab wisely drove off, leaving this woman to finish crossing the road, and recount the whole episode to the gathering crowd of bystanders. We considered pointing out that she was, in fact, walking against the pedestrian signal, but she looked like a really, really angry version of Fran (The Nanny) Drescher, so we thought the better of it.

So, that’s it, end of story. What the f**k are you still looking at anyhow? Show’s over, asshole! What more do you f***ing want? Go f**k yourself!