Dusty's Register of New Workplace Cliches - Bullshit Bingo redux.

You all know Bullshit Bingo right? The game we all play to scoff at mid-level managers who rely on stock phrases and cliches in their efforts to sound important and influential in the workplace? Phrases like "run it up the flagpole", "take a helicopter view" and "blue-sky thinking" used to make all right-thinking people want to laugh and scream simultaneously. 

Trust me when I tell you, it's gotten worse. Far, far worse. So here is Dusty's Register of New Workplace Cliches (now with extra editorialising). Feel free to drop them into your Bullshit Bingo template at www.bullshitbingo.net.

And if you feel brave, try them as part of a workplace drinking game...

Here goes:

• "space" and "playing in this space" - unless we're talking about the outer reaches of the galaxy, and you are Han Solo and Princess Leia, fuck this expression right off.
• "piece" - piece of what? Oh, I know...Piece. Of. Shit.
• "from a <insert generic noun> perspective" - when a work colleague's  husband died last year, our manager actually said, and I'm not joking: "[colleague] hasn't yet advised what [colleague] plans to do from a funeral perspective". Tell me this doesn't make you want to hang your head in shame and then strangle yourself from the nearest door knob with your bra/jock strap.
• "operating rhythm" - since when did we all become bass players?
• "take ownership" - do you mean take some fucking responsibility for your fucking work or better yet, admit your fuck-ups?
• "journey" - Can I be Odysseus/Jason and have my pick of hot sailors for the next 20 years?
• "moving forward / going forward" - where do I start with this one? I would like to substitute this one with the phrase "moonwalking backwards"
• "aligned" or "aligns with" or "aligns to" - makes me want to shove a spirit level or a pot of wallpaper paste up the arse of anyone who uses this word outside of the field of carpentry
• "put a lens over it" or variation: "through a <insert word> lens" - Jesus...
• "bandwidth" unless actually referring to network / data usage this is really another word for "enough time in my day", yes?
• "baseline" as a verb (and the oft-used malarkey "baselining" or "re-baselining")
• "skin in the game" - because we're all secretly Buffalo Bill-type serial killers
• "re-litigate" - do we mean "start again because the first person to do it delivered a pile of steaming hot dogshit?"
• "embed" and "embedment"
• "flow" and "flow-on impact or effect" - 'cos we're all Yogis now...
• "impact" as a verb or "impactful" as an adjective - I have given up avoiding this altogether and concede defeat, which is why I am hoping this rant will impact you all to eliminate once and for all these weaselly phrases from your life and your work.

Bullshit!!!!!